A Subconscious Obstacle

Couples in a relationship usually face similar problems. These problems run through the shallowest of fights to the gravest violations of one’s commitment. There is this problem that most probably couples never know exists until they get to a point in their relationship when they realize, “I don’t really know my partner.”

Oftentimes, people tend to hide behind layers of secrecy. They try their best not to show who they truly are and expose themselves because they are afraid of being vulnerable and eventually, hurt badly. It is a person’s defensive mechanism. This usually starts in the “courting” stage of a relationship. It is a way for a person to deny attachment and commitment early on. More often than not, this “hiding” doesn’t end in that stage. It is carried over into a relationship. This usually is the subconscious problem that a couple will have to face. The one hiding in those layers is not to blame though.

How does a couple defeat this obstacle? TRUST. Trust the one you love. Trust that he (or she) will accept you for who you are. You should be able to show him (or her) your whole self. Don’t be afraid of getting hurt. Take the risk because it will be worth it.

Your partner is most probably as unsure as you are. Someone just has to step up to the plate and make your partner aware that everything will be alright; that no matter what, you will love and respect your partner.

There is no need to blame any side in the relationship. It happens. But you are to blame if you know it exists and still, you do nothing. Trust your partner fully. It starts with you.

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